Breaking

A breaking of the mind, body and spirit all in one week...kind of exhausting...and I need to be careful about defining this process to be over simply because it's Friday, because it could very well continue. I think this past week was the hardest week I've had at Cal Poly since I've been here for so many different reasons. And yet I'm still standing, barely, not by my will and strength, but rather His. It's been an incredibly convicting week for me, and through this I keep my eyes on the words of Paul in Philippians, "that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion in the day of Christ Jesus" (ch 1 vs 6).

In my Architecture studio today the question was asked of us, "why are you here?" I need to wrap my mind around that fact so much more. Why am I here at Cal Poly when I could be so much closer to home? I know the answer to that is a stretching of myself and Him placing me here among all the people around me because He wants to use me for something great and be a part of something unbelievable. Why am I studying Architecture this year when I will eventually be switching majors? So far this year has been unbelievable in what I have done, but more importantly, what I have learned, and they are things that will help me in education and life forever. And for one who's used to getting good grades with little effort, failing when I try so hard is another learning experience. I don't really understand how I am going to get through the next five years school wise, especially with grades, but I'm brought back to the fact that learning is so crucial and so necessary, and as long as I am learning and doing my best, then that's all I can really ask of myself.

But most importantly, as long as the one who began a good work in me continues to complete it and I embark on that journey every day, led by His paths and plans for me, then I am where I need to be, regardless of any circumstances that may transpire...