Fallen

The fact that we are all fallen and fall so short of the glory of God is resonating in my heart tonight...from the lowest peasant servant to those in the highest positions whom everyone is observing.

I just received the news about Ted Haggard and his fall. It disheartens me so much to hear of how a man who fought the demons for Colorado Springs and abroad has lost to his own personal battle with Satan. I am reminded of something God has been teaching me and others lately: the fact that if we are not focused with God on the vertical plane, the horizontal plane can cause us to fall. So often we get burdened with others and the people around us and situations that are happening, and we take those upon our own shoulders. We attempt to carry a burden that we can never carry; the burden of other's lives and souls. We are not meant to carry those burdens. Christ told us to give our burdens to Him because His yoke is light. He is the only one sufficient...yet we so often neglect and forget that, and by doing so, it causes us to stumble, perhaps a slight one at first, but then a great fall.

There is an ever present enemy to our souls. It lurks in the darkness and within things and has a presense we are often unaware of. If we don't realize that and are aware of it, we will continue to fall over and over again. We can't let Satan employ clever schemes, blinding us where the Spirit should be.

We can't neglect the fact that we all fall short of the glory of God. We can't forget that we are all jars of clay, fragile and easily broken. We can't forget that we are nothing apart from Him.

If we do, we are certain to fall...

And until we realize that, we will fall over and over again, into the same trap, because we are so blinded.

I think something that is disturbing me greatly about a lot of this right now is a conversation I had with my dad before coming out to school. We were talking about Ted Haggard and other previous prominent Evangelicals and pastors, and my dad made the statement, "it wouldn't be surprising if he fell just like the others." I defended Ted Haggard, saying that it wouldn't, because he was different than those.

But the fact is, he is no different than you and me. He is in just as desperate need of God and His abundant grace and mercy. He just had a much more visible fall due to his position.

I find myself coming back to that conversation over and over again with my dad thinking about how my dad will probably use this opportunity to say, "yep, there's another hypocritical Christian, living a dual life." And this breaks me because I don't want something else to deter him from coming to know Christ. Yet I must remember that God is working in spite of all of this, and perhaps this will lead to a conversation about grace and how we are all in need of it.

So I leave tonight with this prayer. To my fellow brothers and sisters, let us not neglect the fact that Satan is out there lurking and is looking for any way to get us to fall. "If we think we are standing firm, be careful that we don't fall" (1 Corinthians 10:12). Be reminded of how we are all sinners and all fall short, whether those falls are visible or hidden, they are ever present still. And come back to the One who gives us grace and mercy so endlessly. Don't take on a burden that you are not meant to carry. Leave it all in Christ's hands. He is the only one sufficient.

To those still searching...I pray that this example with Ted Haggard will not further taint your image of Christians and Christianity. I pray that we as Christians will come before you just as we are, broken and in need of God's grace. We are so far from being perfect even though we may often put on fronts that we are or attempt to be. I am sorry that we do not represent God in the way we should. I am sorry that we are hypocrites. I pray that we will be real with you, and show you the God who so graciously loves us, though we don't deserve it.