All other ground is sinking sand...

"On Christ the solid Rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand;
All other ground is sinking sand."

All other ground is sinking sand...it is only upon Christ on which we stand.

How true this rings to me as I sit tonight on the last official night of summer before classes start, thinking and journaling about many different things.

Over the past week, God has been opening my eyes in incredible ways to see so many of the ways He has been faithful. I have been realizing the shaping and refining He has been doing in me and in so many around me. I think that so often we get caught up with the necessary process of growing and advancing that we forget where we've been and where we've come from. It is easy to get discouraged in the midst of pursuing righteousness if we never open our eyes and see the ways in which God has been refining and shaping us. The need for reflection is key. Our pursuing righteousness should always be the goal, and in every moment we should be striving and seeking to become more like Christ, who set the model for us. Yet, at the same time, we should never become so consumed with that goal that we forget the reason why (the love of Christ) the means given (the strength of Christ) and the growth made (the grace of Christ).

I think back to where I was at this time last year, and I think about the ground I was standing on. I was standing on sinking sand, attempting to pull myself up onto the rock, but it was such a struggle to do so. The past year has been a refining of my faith in God, bringing me back to the question, "do I trust Him or not?" in every way. It has been a refining of my character and motives in which I do things. I need to do things because of the love of Christ overflowing out of me, not for any selfish gain or ulterior motives, or even simply "because I should." I have been learning what it means to be a leader and how it's really so little of what I used to think it was. Christ in humility and boldness set the example, and that is the end to which I strive. I have learned what it means in even deeper and more profound ways what it means to truly walk alongside people and love on them. It is definitely a stretching and challenging thing, but one in which I receive so much blessing from.

I have been learning, through the grace of God and grace of others, what it means to be a "woman of Christ," one with a gentle and quiet spirit, slow to speak yet endued with wisdom because she is quick to listen to her Lord. It is a role that I have seldom understood or accepted, but how I find such a beauty and peace within it, because every day and in every step I take, I fall more and more into who God has created me to be. Creation was not complete until Eve was made. The creation of man was not mentioned until it was both male and female. The role of a woman is one I have slighted tremendously, but grace be to God who has opened my eyes to the necessity of such in this world. I am an integral part of creation, just as man is. We are each endowed with our own gifts given to us by the Lord, and it is within those that I need to delight in and develop. And for the first time in my life, I can honestly say how much I love being a woman.

But more than all of these things, I have encountered God more and more with each passing day. As I come to the feet of my Savior and surrender all upon Him, I see the results of what it means to give it all up for Him. It is truly amazing, but even greater still than that, it's still nothing compared to knowing my Savior deeper, greater, and fuller than never before. I can say with full confidence and joy in my heart that He is the One...He is the One of which I desire to profess my love for, rest in His arms, praise ever more. There is none like Him. There is no other love and intimacy quite like it. And that blows my mind. I think about my relationship with John and how incredibly blessed it is as God continues to bring us closer together, man and woman, and the intimacy that grows in that relationship...it is incredible. There is really no blessing in the world like it, but it still pales in comparison to the intimacy found in the Lord. There is such a marked difference in walking by faith and not by sight...in trusting in the One whom you don't see in human manifestation but upon the opening of eyes and hearts is seen in every aspect of the world. There is an incredible thing in our God in that He is incredibly intimate yet incredibly glorious. He knows my heart fully yet He also knows the world. He is the One of whom I will always stand forever in awe of. He is the One who reaches down from Heaven touching which is weak and broken in order to heal fully. He always does and He always will. He is the One, He is my God.

"On Christ, the solid rock I stand...all other ground is sinking sand."

I write this tonight realizing that I am stronger than I ever have been. This isn't anything I have gained on my own; rather, it has been everything I have lost. I stand stronger than I ever have been today because I realize that my strength is nothing. God's is fully everything. Christ is the solid rock on which I stand.

And I can't even begin to speak, comprehend, or fathom what is in store for this year...I know it's a time in which I have been fully prepared and trained for, yet am still completely inadequate in. It's a time of the present yet training for the future. What the means are and how it will all play out remains to be seen.

But I know this:

God is fully in it. I trust in nothing else.

That's more than enough!

"My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly trust in Jesus’ Name."